I’m talking about the perfect Hitchcock-style murder here. Forget the arson attack on corporate headquarters, or the mysterious disappearance of a company into the annals of history (via a merger and acquisition that merged nothing and acquired everything, including the logo and a name that ceased to exist on day one). of the ‘union’). ‘). I mean the subtle poisoning of an organization that goes unnoticed by many and barely suspected by some. I’m talking about slow poisoning by professional killers with a hidden agenda. I’m talking about a thriller script of the husband-poison-wife-with-small-dose-of-cyanide genre, where the poison is administered in an apparently loving environment.

In some organizations it is not that difficult to identify the prime suspects, the toxic managers. You might even know them well; you can even inform them. There are two types: the obviously unpleasant ones and the loving ones. One of them is very dangerous.

That’s right, he is the one who cares, and the one who poisons under the duty of care.

So here are ten scripts for an organizational thriller. You can choose the heroes and villains you want; I am just providing the schematic. You can also choose the extras and the location. I will be the producer. If you get back to me with a developed script, we’ll try Hollywood first and share the profits. Alternatively, we can try business schools: the case study industry is doing well, and frankly, anything is better than learning about Toyota’s penetration of the US market and maximizing shareholder value in the automotive industry in southern California.

Script 1: I know

Caption: I just know we’ll do x, but go ahead and explore all the options.

In this scenario, a senior manager not only openly trusts the teams, but also declares himself the Great Defender of Team Spirit. He nurtures and protects the team from him. He insists on personally mentoring all project leaders, though this is met with mixed feelings. He encourages the team to explore many possibilities, to be open-minded, and to see the big picture. But he ‘just knows what’s going to happen.’ Faced with a problem, he asks for ideas, even though he “already knows the answer.” This pattern is repeated several times, until the team begins to suspect that he is wasting his time and that the Big Guy is just playing to his ego. By the time the toxicity is revealed, half of the project leaders have left in search of a boss who “knows less,” and the other half are bored or enjoying their stock options.

Script 2: Let them fail

Subtitle: Wrong way, but you need to see for yourself.

This script plays out in patronizing and patronizing organizations where top management has chronically mistaken a corporate organization for an elementary school. Toxicity is very subtle because it manifests itself in a so-called learning environment where people “learn from their mistakes” and are “trained to take risks.” The suspicion arises midway through the script when some people who fail get fired. The article ends with people laughing as the CEO speaks highly of knowledge management as he collects the Learning Organization of the Year Award.

Script 3: Try harder

Subtitle: Guess what I want.

Teams are always “not quite there” when they present the results of a three-month analysis of the problem, returning again and again to refine their exploration. Eventually, a project leader has a revelation and asks, “Why doesn’t he tell us what he wants? That would save us from having to keep ‘going back to the team.'”

Script 4: I have the answer, what is the question?

Caption: I was there, I did that, trust me I know.

A variation on Script 1, this organization is run by managers who constantly refer to their previous experiences. If it’s a change management program, bring the McKinsey templates from the mergers and acquisitions of his last company to the first kick-off meeting. The answers are there and they have them. If it is a human resources problem, they are super psychologists. If it’s a financial problem, they know because they’ve been there before. Reality is pretty much mapped out, causing the staff to tune out creatively. Sudden death occurs in this scenario when market conditions change drastically and the combined wisdom of those seasoned managers cannot make up for the lack of new ideas and imagination.

Scenario 5: Legitimized suicide

Subtitle: You decide who’s redundant: This is a very human merger and acquisition.

The story begins with M&A consulting gurus deciding it’s better to let the staff decide who will survive, rather than burden the leadership team with such an inhumane decision. Division heads meet and are given a business plan and timeline. After several sleepless nights, a good third of the managers and staff decide they are going to be fired, so they leave. The trick in this script is that there is no visible killer. Instead, several staff members commit mass suicide while singing a rousing chorus of ‘What a wonderful human death this is’. The ending has a twist: two surviving division heads blame the leadership team for clearly giving up their responsibilities and disguising the whole thing as a democratic decision, while the CEO uses the case to show how humane, democratic and open the company is. .

Script 6: Do but don’t do

Subheading: Feel free to, but make sure we tell you what.

This story takes place in a ‘free’ environment where people are encouraged to take all kinds of initiatives, to act. The examples are numerous. On one occasion, a manager implements a program that she feels encouraged to do. She is reprimanded and de facto demoted. Bewildered and frustrated, she leaves. Colleagues demand an explanation, but don’t get too far. The script ends with highlights of collective frustration as this pattern of ‘do it, but don’t do it’ is discovered to be common across the board.

Script 7: You have the power to believe me

Subtitle: We are all empowered, but I am more empowered than others.

This plot is largely based on the concept of ‘We are all equal, but some of us are more equal than others’. Empowerment is a widely used buzzword in the organization and figures prominently in its mission statement. Life is relatively quiet until a manager asks the question, “What does it mean?” The enraged top management responds with a lengthy lecture on trust, culture, values ​​and principles. The little one asks again: “But what does it mean to be empowered?” The big guy says, “Look how empowered I am by the Board.” Unsightly graffiti begins to appear on walls, doors and toilet partitions with statements about the credibility of the company’s rhetoric. The organization slowly dies from buzzword poisoning.

Scenario 8: Maximum responsibility, minimum authority

Subtitle: Big titles, big visibility, big blindness.

In this scenario, the responsibilities of the organization are well defined: everyone knows what they are responsible for. But small hidden doses of toxicity come from giving staff the impression that they have the authority to go with it. As it turns out, this is simply not true. The authority is found elsewhere, with people who are not very responsible for anything other than amassing as much authority as possible. Managers’ egos are bolstered with big ‘responsible’ titles like Global Project Leader (a company equivalent of the UN Secretary General). Some staff members discover that they have no real authority and run away from the organization. Those caught in go blind. The Big Titles game ends when more and more managers become suspicious of the mismatch between responsibility and authority. The CEO responds by creating a new layer of highly responsible managers with very attractive titles on their business cards.

Script 9: Big goals, big future, big cuts

Subtitle: We’re doing well but you’re fired.

Growth has been declared within the organization, and its annual results are not bad. The CEO declares high hopes and possibilities. Almost simultaneously, R&D is reduced by 20% and people in the wrong place at the wrong time are laid off, regardless of their talent. The pattern is repeated several times as the plot progresses, until a Pavlovian reflex develops: every time the CEO announces a “good year, great results, we need to grow,” the staff trembles.

Script 10: Boiling Frog

Subtitle: There are two ways to boil a frog and you should already be feeling a bit warm.

This is based on the old adage that there are two ways to boil a frog. One way is to get a pot of boiling water and throw the frog into it. The frog is burned, but quickly jumps out and survives. The second way is to put the frog in a pot of cold water and turn on the fire. The frog is very happy in its gradually warm and cozy environment until it boils without realizing it. This script is offered for free interpretation and application to the life of managers in organizations.

script 11 – math has never been my forte – is based on a combination of the other ten. In this script, the managers think all the previous scripts are a bit of a joke, funny stories with barely worked out ideas, certainly not a reflection of real life, a bit of fun disguised as managerial thinking. Readers in script 11 mode may feel warm and cozy. Please check that the heat is turned off.