So, you were recently dumped… it happens to the best of us and nothing feels worse. Losing love is hard enough, but it adds rejection to the mix and it can be devastating. It can take quite a blow to your ego. I know, because about a year ago I was dumped by the guy I thought was “the one” (did I mention we were together for 6 years?). The days that followed were probably the worst days I’ve ever had.

1. Know that it’s not always your fault.

Sometimes things just don’t work… that’s not your fault. Take comfort in knowing that some things are simply out of your control.

2. Don’t stop there.

One thing you can do after being shot down is keep going. There is no point in wasting time obsessing over something that will never work. Insisting on the subject will only make you bitter.

3. Desperate pleas/Calling your ex, etc.

I understand why you would do this. You also understand that it’s just because you love your ex, and the truth is that you really want them to take you back. You feel so hopeless without them that you don’t have time to think. But you feel like if you can say it enough times… or send the highest message… STOP. In the right frame of mind, you probably already know that this works against you. When your ex doesn’t respond to these, you’ll feel even worse. Remember, your ex ended the relationship.

4. Stop feeling sorry for yourself.

You may not know what to do, maybe you started scanning yourself again looking for something bad inside of you to justify this rejection, or maybe you just labeled yourself with labels like “loser” or “failure”, or maybe you even got depressed .