My children ask me all the time to take them to playgrounds or any other public place. I can’t help but think that the risk involved in this is greater than we are often aware of. I have four children, which makes keeping track of all of them very stressful. For me, taking my children to a public place is no longer “a walk in the park”. Actually, I feel like I’m a bit traumatized. My 8 year old son, (a very active little boy), has gotten lost in public places 3 times. Once in a department store at age 3, another time in a nature park where he took off alone on his bike at age 4, and the last time at a crowded public fair at age 5. he has always been safe and sound.

Young children are very unpredictable. Their logic is very different from ours. They tend to forget the importance of being close to you and are very easily distracted.

How many times have you taken your children to a playground and suddenly you don’t see them anymore, you start looking for them and your heart starts beating hard. Fortunately, you finally see them playing without realizing the panic attack you just had. It all happens in seconds, but it seems like an eternity until you finally see your precious children again. But for how many parents is this not the case? How many of them never find their child who was right next to them a minute ago? Who had just been seen playing in the playground a second ago?

What can we do as parents to prevent such a tragedy from happening to our family? The best we can do is be prepared and take some simple precautions and do everything we can to prevent this terrible thing from happening.

Whenever you go to a public place with young children, keep these 10 tips in mind:

1. Remind them of the importance of being close to you and always letting you know where they are going. This may sound very simple, but the best way to avoid losing your children is to have them close to you at all times.

2. Teach them the importance of keeping a safe distance from you. If they can’t see you, they are no longer at a safe distance.

3. Pick a meeting place that you know they can remember in case they get lost. If the children are too young, it may be a better idea to tell them to stay where they realized they were lost. Most of the time you are not too far from them. But if they start looking for you, it will be much harder to find them.

4. If you are in a shopping mall or department store, identify the staff uniform and security guard uniform with your children. Ask them to look for them if they feel lost.

5. Teach them not to talk to strangers. It’s unfortunate that we need to teach our children to avoid talking to strangers, but the truth is, in today’s world, it’s no longer safe to let your children speak freely with a stranger.

6. If your children are old enough to memorize phone numbers, review basic family information such as home phone number, cell phone number, and address. Also, give them some change in case they need to call you from a pay phone.

7. Memorize the clothes they wear. If it makes it easier for you, put similar colors on all your children. During a panic attack, you are confused enough to even forget what your child is wearing.

8. Put a card in one of your pockets with all the basic information: your name, your child’s name, phone number, cell phone numbers, and address. Even if the child can memorize this information, she too will panic and might forget everything. Do not post this information in a conspicuous place as a kidnapper could take advantage of this to create a family atmosphere by calling the child by her own name. It is also important to avoid any clothing that contains your child’s name.

9. Choose books from the library that teach children why it’s so important not to talk to strangers, and once you’re done reading, take some time to discuss the content with your children. You can ask them questions to make sure they understand the message. You can also play the “what if” game and let them figure out what to do in some imaginary dangerous situation.

10. Last but not least, talk to them about the dangers a young child has these days. Unfortunately, we have to give our children some tools to defend themselves in the event of a kidnapping attempt. They must know what to do so they can act quickly. They must not converse with any stranger. If the stranger insists on talking to them, they should immediately leave and ignore the person. They should not volunteer to give information or instructions to a stranger. They should also be aware of the tricks kidnappers use to lure a child. They could use a cute puppy or ask them to find a lost puppy. You could use yummy candy or engaging toys. They might seem very friendly, or they might even look like adorable grandmas.

The first time my son got lost in the department store, I kept thinking about all the things we should have done to prevent this from happening. When they finally found him, I thought it would be the first and last time this would happen. I was so scared of losing my son again that I did little to prepare him for a similar incident. When it happened the second time, I realized the importance of having a plan in place. I also realized that fear gets you nowhere. You have to act before it’s too late. Once your son is lost, he is alone. If he hasn’t been prepared for this situation, the only hope you’ll have is to trust in his own ability to find you. Nothing can guarantee that our children will not be lost. But at least your child has a way to help himself when you can’t help him. This could very well save your life.